Please allow me to introduce myself. I realize in terms of blogging that I have left out the necessary introductory post, where I tell all of you about myself and why I have decided to start blogging. Now that I have a somewhat captive audience I figured I would throw it out there.

Here’s the deal, if you’ve read my previous posts (all or some) you hopefully have been getting a pretty good idea of who I am. If you’ve been reading them and are still in the dark, well then read this, then go back and re-read all the other posts and maybe it will begin to make more sense to you. 

So I started this adventure called “my life” back in 1987 with a lot of help from my parents and some support, but more pokes and prods, from my older brother Mark. Almost three years into this new life, Chris came along and RUINED EVERYTHING! I am just kidding, but that was my reaction to basically anything he did post infancy until probably mid-high school. I love my family, seriously, they are the funniest people on earth. You should see our group iMessages. They are also the most supportive and loving people ever, despite the fisticuffs we’ve been known to engage in. Don’t worry it’s been at least a year since the last fisticuff. (I really like using the word fisticuff, I now need to use it on a regular basis.)

I am a fiercely loyal friend. I will engage in fisticuffs (see I told you I liked the word fisticuffs) and bar brawls for my friends. For real. I overuse the term “best friend” because I consider A LOT of people to be my best friends. Deal with it. My friends are just another branch on the Kelly family tree. Even if we don’t talk anymore, there’s still a branch for you, it’s why I have a hard time deleting people from Facebook.  

There are a few friends that I refer to as my brothers or sisters. These people have seen me cry, and I don’t mean just silent tears streaming down my face. I mean full on ugly cry, where I have sought them out to be my rock in the turbulent times of my life. These people are right up there with my brothers and parents, though most of the time they don’t mock me as much. 

It is because of a few of these sister/brother friends that I started writing down my stories and thoughts and put them on the inter webs. They encouraged/bullied me into pursuing my incessant need to share my thoughts and stories. It was 75% encouragement and 5% bullying, and the other 20% came from my bedroom walls and car who were tired of having to listen to me ramble on.

So here it is. I am now blogging. And more so I am now publicly posting the blog on social media. Baby steps. I am a rambler, and I get off on tangents super easily. You should be a fly on the wall when I am writing these things down, one time is all it takes. Also just be happy that the finished products are under a 1000 words, because before I re-read and edit them they only make sense to me…and trust me, no one wants to read my stream of consciousness, I don’t even want to read it. 

So thanks for joining me in this new venture I hope you enjoy the ride. 

If you’re my friend you now know that I would hit someone with a pool cue for you. And now my brothers, parents, and the rest of the world knows that I would straight up punch a person out for them. I am sure my parents would be so proud. 

Apologies to my brothers, Mark and Chris, for posting things about you to the internet without your consent or permission. And to my parents, for not always accurately portraying you. The perspective of a child is vastly different from that of semi-grown up Kelly.

To my friends who’ve seen me ugly cry…yeah…um…let’s just not talk about it.

For those of you who understand the title, congrats, I accept you.

If you haven’t figured out the significance to the title of this post and how it relates, Google it, then let me know what you find out. Enjoy the rabbit hole.